What would you do if you received this message, not once, but several
times in the same week, from someone you believed to be speaking for God?
You have been tried in the scales and found wanting.
First I tried to ignore it, but when it kept repeating, I bounced off all
the walls, mentally and emotionally, if not physically.
I tried to find some reason to think I was dropping off channel. I wanted
to believe this message did not come from a good source. I tried to reject
the source as a liar, but that didn't work because this particular voice
has proved trustworthy far too often. And besides, I suspected the message
might well be true.
After that I felt sorry for myself. If God had decided to drop me, it wasn't
my fault. I tried. I wanted to be good. I just didn't make it. Poor me.
Then I went over a long list of reasons why God might decide to drop me,
but that wasn't much fun, so I went back to feeling sorry for myself.
On and on, around and around, I thrashed over the implications of those
ten terrible words for the next two weeks. Finally, the message of doom
came again, while I was trying to work on something else, and I asked the
question I should have asked in the first place: "Okay, what do you
mean by that?"
The answer was prompt. It was a mental motion-picture of a newborn baby
being lifted in gentle hands, placed in a soft blanket on a baby-scales,
and found to need extra care, additional nourishment, special attention,
life support ...
I wept at the realization of how terribly I had misjudged my God.